I Thought It Would be Easier

{Two Things Tuesday Vol. #10}

Oh, This is Us.

{Source: https://www.nbc.com/this-is-us/photos}

I’m not a huge TV person, but this show is GOOD. And addicting, heart wrenching, funny… you name it. I’m already looking forward to tonight’s episode… even though we’ll probably watch tomorrow because 9pm is late in our world.

I Thought It Would Be Easier

In last week’s episode Jack mentioned he thought stopping drinking, and also talking about his recovery, would be easier. All week I’ve been going back to the part where he tells his wife, Rebecca, “I thought it would be easier…” as they were having trouble re-connecting.

There are so many things in life that seem like they’ll be easier until you actually DO them, right? It’s not like you think parenting is going to be easy, but you have no idea just how hard some parts are until you actually go through it yourself. The same thing with running a business, getting married, keeping up with friendships, staying in shape… all usually harder than you imagine.

The cool part is that most of the things you thought would be easier often provide the greatest life lessons as you venture through the ups and downs. Of course, I knew it would be harder to exercise consistently when I had kids, but I had no idea just how hard and that sometimes it wouldn’t even be ‘hard’ for the reasons I initially thought. Who knew it wouldn’t just be hard to find the time because of crazy schedules and tiny humans who needed me? Who knew it would go beyond mustering up the energy on little sleep sometimes?

A post shared by Sistas of Strength (@amandamaryperry) on Oct 15, 2017 at 10:51am PDT

I didn’t realize the emotional impact motherhood would have on me. I had no clue that part of the reason training as consistently would be hard is this thing called mom guilt. Even wife guilt sometimes. This past weekend I had a serious case of mom guilt going to the gym to train when my kid was sick. Even though he was more than fine at home with dad, I felt horrible that I wasn’t right there the whole time. Then I had more mom guilt yesterday when he was home with me, but I had to work most of the day.

The mom guilt doesn’t end. The schedules don’t slow down. It doesn’t get easier to find time to squeeze in workouts, date nights and time with friends. Once we’re in the thick of this parenting gig, most of us discover we really weren’t allll that busy before kids, even though it seemed it at the time.

Just because you thought parenting would be easier, you aren’t going to stop, right? When a member at SOS tells me something is hard, I often respond with something like, if it was easy everyone would do it. Sure, lifting might be hard for you. Showing up consistently, and on time, might be hard. Turning down free cookies might be hard. But imagine what you’ll learn if you keep going, keep growing and keep paying attention. Imagine what you’ll save in medical bills and gain in life experiences when you’ve got your health.

Enjoy today’s TWO THINGS TUESDAY to help you keep doing the hard things… even those you thought would be easier. When you’re doing the hard things with purpose, the payoff is often priceless. Don’t forget, if you’ve been reading something you think I’d love and should share here, please let me know!

Maintaining Friendships and Making Decisions

1. Maintaining friendships is hard. It’s funny, I came across this article last week after emphasizing the importance of maintaining friendships, date nights and time to yourself. I had NO idea how hard it would be to make and keep friends during these whacky years, but the payoff is huge. This is something I didn’t realize about motherhood. Yup, I thought it would be easier…

2. Stop worrying about making the right decision. As someone who generally sucks at making decisions, this was a great read. Seriously, I can spend hours upon hours deciding on a paint color or where I want to go to dinner this coming weekend. Lame. When it comes to important family and business decisions I will clearly take even longer when left to my own devices. Slowly, but surely I’m learning that sometimes you truly just have to make a darn decision and then make that decision right…or do something else.

“Merely selecting the “best” option doesn’t guarantee that things will turn out well in the long run, just as making a sub-optimal choice doesn’t doom us to failure or unhappiness. It’s what happens next (and in the days, months, and years that follow) that ultimately determines whether a given decision was “right.…

So when we’re stuck or even paralyzed by a decision, we need more than rational analysis. We need to vividly envision ourselves in a future scenario, get in touch with the emotions this generates and assess how those feelings influence our level of commitment to that particular choice.”We can’t always make the right decision, but we can make every decision right. Click To Tweet